Aaargh!!!!

Boy do they love their paperwork here in Colombia!

I had my wallet taken, you might remember, some time ago, and since then I have been trying to get my online banking going. Of course in order to do that I have to have some passwords. That's right, "some" passwords, not "a" password. And of course the first of these has to be issued by the bank. Well... I got my first set of passwords, one for the telephone/internet startup and one for the cash machine and a very nice and helpful gentleman at the bank helped me get started with them. After showing me how to use the one for the ATM (as if I didn't know how to work one of those!!!!) he tore up that password and sent me on my way with the telephone/internet startup on. Only, turns out that he ripped up the wrong one.....

So....... back to the bank for another set. Which I had to wait for. Again. Finally I got a call, just before my Christmas vacation, saying that they would courier the numbers to my apartment on the 29th of December. I told them, in my very very good Spanish, that no, that wouldn't work since I would be in Cartagena at that time. Fine, they said. How about the 2nd of January? Perfect!

Except that they showed up at my apartment, my portero told me, on the 29th of December! No biggee, I thought. They goofed, but they will return on the second, since that is what we arranged.

Nope.

Wait another day, my portero told me. It is afterall Christmas break and we are in Colombia..... Fine.

Nope.

Well, today I had had it with waiting and I marched myself down to my bank to pick up the passwords myself. After an hour wait (it wsa a very busy bank day) I watched a very pretty and adept young woman type things into her computer and then tell me that, no problem, in 8 days I will have it.

Nope.

That is what I told her, as my blood raced and tears welled up in my eyes. No, I want my passwords today. She shook her head apologetically and tsked tsked at me. Luckily for her, the woman next to her, who remembered me from before Christmas, quickly told her that there had to be some mistake and that she should make a call. Which she did. And she proudly beamed at me that I would have them tomorrow.

Nope.

That is what I told her, my courage rushing so loudly I could barely hear her try and tell me that was impossible. So I told her, in my nearly perfect Spanish, that by golly, they had those passwords on December 29, a date I had clearly told them would not work for me, so where oh where are they hiding the passwords now?????? Sensing that she shouldn't mess with me, she stuttered something about them being in an office in the central part of Bogota. I said fine, I would go get them myself!

You have to understand my frustration. Not only was it the number of days, nay weeks, that I had been after this information, but also the amount of paperwork involved. But they so love their paperwork here! Did I tell you the one about a mom and her daughter, let's call her Christina, who went in search of a Post Office where said daughter could mail some postcards? Not as easy a feat as one might expect. One man we asked didn't even realize that stamps were required for mailing a post card.... We, I mean 'they' did find a place eventually and after $3.00 a postcard, the filling out of a form, and fingerprinting, were able to get six of the eight post cards mailed. (Only six because that was all the stamps they had....)

Anyway, so I did head out by myself to get my blasted passwords1 Even though it was a long drive through not a good neighborhood, where I got whistled at (at least I appeal to someone.....). And I did get my passwords. From a very nice gentleman who also agreed to let me call him the next morning so that he could help me get set up with my online banking. He even hailed me a cab for the drive back home. Well, two cabs actually, since the first one took out a motorcyclist while pulling over for me....

The bright spot of the day? Well, aside from actually getting the passwords and a number to call for help (in English)? The very talkative and friendly cab driver (the one in the second cab hailed for me) gave me his CD as a 'welcome to Colombia' gift. Which makes up for the fact that I never did get the CD from that cab driver a while back.

My faith in humanity restored, I look forward to plenty of bill paying online in the future!